Don't Ask, Do Tell

We'd like to think that we live in a democracy. We operate as a republic. We'd like to view our history as a series of triumphs by and for the people, the kind of struggles that my cousin made a career out of writing about. So we like to make any and every issue we can open to a vote. Not doing so goes against the fabric of the nation; it is anti-American. However, certain facets in human nature, namely, in the case I'm about discuss, the fear of what is different, will prevent us from making a decision that ultimately serves our interest. As a result, our vote hurts us in the long run.

In a perfect society, we could put every issue up to a vote, and rest assured that every opinion would be completely unbiased. Unfortunately, we are and will always be imperfect. And so we sometimes must be protected from our own nature. This is the case with civil rights.

We have put LGBT rights up to a vote in several states, hoping that the public will bolt the closet open when it's ready. The result of those efforts is that 39 states currently do not support gay marriage. A military officer can still be fired for disclosing his or her sexuality.

Civil rights efforts in the past were not successful because they were put up to a vote. They were successful because they used force. They would have their rights, and they wouldn't see otherwise. That meant refusing to sit in the back of the bus. It also meant finding one key figure who knows how to get a point across, but is also non-threatening enough to be identifiable with people who normally wouldn't consider patronizing the gay rights movement. That is, the LGBT community needs its own Martin Luther King. A few figures have come close (i.e Harvey Milk), but none have become universal symbols of the community.

Only when those rights are won can we begin to educate. Just as we are taught to respect other students, regardless of their ethnicity, religion, or skin color, (and that experimentation with religion, or conversion to another, is also okay), we need to be taught to respect others for their sexuality and how they choose to express it (as in clothing choices or their partner(s). When we have been taught to respect sexuality in others, we can learn to accept it in ourselves. And that means a society that is more open to experimentation, and even sexual fluctuations. We may not always be permanently gay, straight, or bisexual. Only when we realize that our desires change can we be subconsciously satisfied.

Ideally, a society should be devoid of labels. There should be no gay, straight, transgender, or bisexual-only sexual. Just as there would be no race, religion, (or anything else John Lennon may have imagined). But, because we think in terms of what we are not, we will label (i.e "He likes men. He is gay. I'm straight. I'm labeling him to describe how he is different"). And we either take solace in our own label, or we learn to fear the other label. A gay man might take pride in being gay, and a straight man might be afraid of homosexuality. Regardless of label, however, sexuality is a part of our nature. It is as fundamentally human as race. And it's not going anywhere. So if we learn to come to terms with it, and not spend our energy fighting it, we will be a more content society that is able to devote our time to other matters. We will have a bigger, more skilled army because we're not turning away gay soldiers. We will be able to tackle global warming or the deficit sooner because we're not discussing gay marriage. And you have my vote on that.