So You're Shy

You've even shifted your ideas about how the world works a few times over. And you're an open-minded intellectual. So you look for that special friend who likes exactly what you like.

The bad news: You're not that special.
The good news: You're not that special.

Nobody will like exactly what you like-exactly the way you like it. You can either sit around and feel sorry for your oh-so-smart self, or you can accept that being different is a part of life. And you learn to like it.

You've gone through high school shunning everyone who wasn't nearly as talented as you are. Now, college comes around and you're tired of having nothing to do on a Saturday night. What do you do?

You start small. Nobody ever magically becomes the life of a party in one day. And right now, you'd probably like to just be invited to one. Just because people are different doesn't mean they have to be complete opposites. Take one thing you'd like to share in common and build on that. Have a passion for writing? Join the school newspaper. Find other people who like to write. You might even learn a little bit from them.

This one's a given, but join a crapload of clubs. It doesn't matter that you were the Vice President of your high school Key Club and you can still smell the brownies you burned...er...baked for Language Club in your kitchen. It's not high school anymore. You've had the summer to shake off all those connections. Well, do you want to start meeting people or not?

Get a job. No, I don't care that the Sociology paper you've been living to write is due in one month. Find something you like to do. Love animals? Become a professional dog walker. Want to help people get in shape? Become a personal trainer. I understand the economy sucks right now. We're all feeling it. You may not wind up with that perfect job. So work as a Starbucks barista. Then you and your coworkers can go out after and all talk about how much your job sucks.

Can't find a job? Or maybe you've found one, but taking twenty credits a semester doesn't leave enough time. Volunteer work gives a more flexible schedule (So you're not always stuck with the 9-5 grind). Alley Pond Environmental Center assigns every volunteer one day a week. That's it. You do what you love and you meet a few other people who love doing it. And you still have time to write that paper. Easy.

So you've tried to get a job and you've been turned down. Or you really couldn't stand working as a Starbucks barista. And APEC wasn't your thing either. And you don't want to spend more time in school than you already are. You don't have to get social just yet, if you really think you're not ready.

Make a list of a few things you've always wanted to do. You don't have to be talented at any of them. You might be downright horrible. Doesn't matter. You're not trying to make a living off of them. They could be small. I've always wanted to learn how to tap dance. So I'm taking an introductory class next semester. I'm not going to be a Broadway star. But I've always wanted to do it, and, well, what's the point of thinking of things you want to do if you're not actually going to do it?

If you're still reading...wait...you're still reading? Well, Mr. (or Ms.) shy intellectual, the world is yours...if you want it. You're witty and you have more than your share to contribute to the world. Start small. Just as long as you start.